Thursday, July 7, 2011


“Change the voices in your head, make them like you instead.” You've heard me quote this before, haven't you? That is a verse from one of my favorite songs by the artist Pink. I listen to this song every day and sing it at the top of my lungs, as if those powerful words are coming from my very heart. You see, I have always known the right words to say; I have always known the correct actions to take. I was at the top of my Psychology classes in college. I was an avid Oprah viewer. I have always been the person to whom everyone came for advice. My problem has never been knowing. My problem, instead, has been doing. Or, not doing, if you will.

During the course of my studies, I learned that procrastination is a symptom of unhealthy self-esteem. I knew I was a procrastinator and I knew my self-esteem was non-existent, but I'd never correlated the two. I would put off any activity that would affect me in a positive way. For instance, it took me five years to write my novel because I kept starting and stopping the creative process. Now that it’s finished, it’s taken me another two years to get up the nerve to send out query letters to literary agents. I even put off completing my PhD courses when I know my goal is to finish the degree program before my fortieth birthday.

I have also come to realize that I have been an impostor. I smile and go about each day pretending that I’m the happiest person alive, when inside I am berating myself for how much weight I’ve gained and how I’ve done nothing with my life. I’ve been unhappy for a large part of my life, but to the outside world, I am cheerful and friendly.

Starting today, I'm going to do things a little differently. We've been creating positive affirmations in one of my courses and my new, positive affirmation is this: “I am a strong, healthy, happy, and capable woman. In a word, I am perfect - just as I am. When I set my mind on a goal, I work at it until I have accomplished it. I can and will do any great thing I decide to do. I, alone, am responsible for my life and I choose to make that life a great one. I choose happiness. I choose to love myself unconditionally.”

Won't you create a positive affirmation, too? Together we will tell our inner voices that we are the ones in charge. Every time it whispers something negative in our ears, we will counteract that negative with something powerfully positive.

Let's choose happiness.

We deserve it.

Until next time,
Feed on love, subsist on peace.


  1. Beautiful post...and a great reminder to take care of our insides!

  2. when I was going through some crazy stressful stuff at work I was given a New Zealand Maori saying that I use as my affirmation (or magic spell). I have it on my blog too so I dont forget. Kia Kaha - Be strong (and bring it on)
    I have used other affirmations and motivations before and they always work to improve my life.

  3. I love Pink! Glad you're working on liking YOU!

  4. i've always kinda wondered where this "self esteem" thing comes from that people expect me to have. when i was younger, i would pretend to have it, because i knew it was a desirable trait and i wanted to be liked. not sure what kind of person that makes me.

  5. I love this post and have gotta say this: are you my soul sister? Everything you say was directed to me.

    Thank you for giving me a swift, yet encouraging, kick in the butt. If you want things to happen, you've got to be the one to do it.

    Thank you so much! You have no idea what this post means to me.

  6. Fantastic post. I could learn a lot from you. Now that Oprah's gone, we all need someone to give us inspiration. Too bad you already found a job, I think you'd kick ass in her's.

  7. Stephanie- Thank you! We must definitely take care of our "insides" if we want anything even remotely resembling happy "outsides."

    Mynx- Affirmations, magic spells...I use whatever works. And I've used both. ;)

    Lola- I love her, too. My daughter and I like to roll the car windows down and sing at the top of our lungs to her CD.

    Lovkyne- It makes you normal. It makes you human.

    Favorite Things - Firstly, your name reminds me of Oprah. Secondly, I may very well be your soul sister. I like to think that the gods place upon my heart that which is most needed by someone else. That means if you feel like my message was directed to you, it most certainly was. I'm so glad you found it helpful.

    Holly- Thanks so much! I, too, believe that I would kick ass at Oprah's job. lol And I would take that one over the one I have in a heartbeat because hers pays a whole lot better. Not that I'm ungrateful...


Let me hear your voice.